Ice Cream And Suicide
Ice Cream And Suicide
By Jack Ray
Ice Cream And Suicide copyright © 2017 by Jack Ray. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America by Amazon. No parts of this book may be reproduced.
“And in this harsh world draw thy breath in pain. To tell my story.” -Shakespeare’s Hamlet
Pandora’s Box
How can I ever move on...
No.
I will move on.
I’m finished with
Your games.
You’ve hurt me
For the last time.
This book is
A testimony to that.
I’ll show you
Everything you’ve lost
Everything you’ve forgotten
Everything you made me feel
Everything you did to destroy me.
This is us.
This will always be us.
And this is all that’s left
Of us.
1201:16
We were cold
So you asked for hot chocolate
Rather I was told
That you needed it
Snow fall from heaven
Lights hang from every inch
The show starts at seven
Better watch the dance
"You could do that"
I always tried to encourage
"No, I'm too fat"
Trust me she isn't at all
Ornaments sparked off the tree
So we gathered round the center
Didn't really impress me honestly
But I was focused on her
As we turned away to leave
I asked about her hot chocolate
She had something up her sleeve
When she said "It's perfect"
Then as we walked away
My eyes were glued to her beauty
I asked about her day
"With you? It's perfect.”
~Why did you lie to me?
Devout
I told myself I’d stop.
Stop loving the wrong person
And quit giving my life
To a façade who takes
Everything from me.
These are the lies
I’ll tell myself.
Secretary Of War
Look at you
Living like what you did
Was nothing but a pinch
When really
It was an atomic bomb.
Free Samples, Take One Please!
I sympathize with those
Who have been given a
Taste of eternity
Just to be told
That it’s sold out.
Blue-Ridge Mountains
Her eyes are
The rolling hills and skyline
That tell the history
Of her earth
From creation to obliteration
The moment I marched
Into her forest
Denatured her flora
And enslaved her fauna
Settled in that perfect world
That was not so perfect
After all, thanks to me.
Women like her
With eyes like her
Are meant to be free.
There is no one deserving
Of them and to believe
That you are,
Is a slap in the face
Of Mother Nature.
Masochistic
You know you do this to yourself.
You break your own heart.
Flood your mind with the thoughts.
It's all in how you see yourself.
Only you have the power to stop this.
But I know why you haven't.
Without this, what do you have left?
Back To Square One
I can’t say I didn’t
See this coming.
When will you learn
To stop being so
Stubborn
And allow me to
Finish what we started.
Priceless Love
You’re so precious
With your
Eyes of sapphire
Locks of gold
And heart of ruby.
All too valuable
But no one could
Ever put a price on
Your gorgeous body.
Desire Isn’t A Strong Enough Word
There’s not a spot
On your body
I want to forget.
The softness of your
Skin in mine.
Every pore is unique,
And yet they all lead
To the heart of
My angel of pleasure.
My Confessional
Truth is I do miss you.
And yes
I do want you.
I want you more than
Anything this
Piece of shit rock
We call Earth could
Ever offer the likes of me.
And there’s more too.
The sound you produce
May be the most
Alluring and addictive drug
To hit the market.
I know this, yet I want it.
I want it so badly.
I want to play that drug
On repeat 24/7/365.
And when we encounter each other,
It’s like the first time we’ve ever met.
I’ll find myself staring at you
Undressing you in my head,
Revealing those cute curves that
Make up the little frame of the one I love
Because baby,
The truth is I do miss you.
And yes
I do want you.
~Your secret admirer.
Wash, Rinse, Repeat
I am the ink
That stains your clothes
And marks your skin.
Such an anomaly,
This I am certain.
Over Their Heads
You know there’s a problem
When someone says
“Don’t tell”
...It was fun nonetheless.
The Love That Strangles
comes only from
her. I need her.
the love that strangles.
smothering, suffocating
my cries for help. blinding
in passion to live
again inside her blood.
ignored. forgotten.
a fool to man and
a fool to her.
the love that strangles.
I hear her voice.
a beautiful pitch.
false promises are what
she sings. a melody,
a master, a slave.
an orchestra of
sound. she speaks in
a tongue of deceit
embodied in
beauty. twisted hymns
manipulate even a
saint.
the love that strangles.
when you see her.
cloaked in golden
rays of desolation.
eyes that pierce the
soul of man, blue,
as the talisman of
Nazar. strong, lean,
and inviting. Delilah.
the love that strangles
comes only from
her. I need her.
I need her.
Out Of Batteries
I laid into you
To feel your heart
Beat with mine,
What I heard
Was silence.
Sadistic
I cried out for help.
The
pain of us
Was numbing over
But in a sick
Twist of fate
The only one I
Could vent to
Was you.
The very person
Who made me this way.
Perceptions
Sometimes I look at her and think,
"Damn, she's otherworldly,
There's not a single soul out there like her's."
Except mine.
Perceptions II
It’s a crazy thing
Thinking you’re so close to someone
When really
You’re worlds apart.
Perceptions III
You know as well as I do
That the memories
Begin to alter.
They take on personalities
Of their own.
They become self-aware caricatures
Of who we are and what
We want them to be.
Good,
Bad,
Or ugly
Our minds show us what
We believe,
What we felt at the time
Of sanctification.
Heyyyy
The amount of
Self discipline
It takes
To keep me
From texting you
Is absurd.
I Can’t Be Alone With You
A relationship
In which both parties
Are afraid to be alone
With each other
Isn’t real.
Illimitable Dominion
There’s a tremendous
Tragedy in the performance of
Two lovers.
One in which
The brave and the bold
Are ridiculed and denounced
By the lame and the sheepish
Till the brave become cowards
The bold become servants
To the serpent who pulls
All the strings.
And once the tongues
Are tied in a knot
That even the Almighty
Could not untie
The couple will live happily ever after...
Never to be heard of again.
Plan B
Say it with me...
I am strong.
I am good enough.
I will never be
Someone’s backup plan.
Green Mushrooms
The hardest part is knowing,
That we’ve come so far,
That you’d never wanna start over
And give us another chance.
Looks Can Be Deceiving
She’s the type of girl
To walk you to the
Edge of the earth,
Spend the afternoon with you
And shove you off afterwards.
Good Mourning
I know you don’t know this
But I think you should...
I wake up every morning
To your face, smiling back at me.
It’s burned into my skull
Like a phantom longing for
A place to stay.
You follow me no matter
Where I lay my head,
I’ll awake and you’ll be there.
And it hurts.
It hurts.
It hurts so bad because
I would waste a million lifetimes
Doing nothing but chasing you.
Die day after day, if it meant
Having you to hold again.
I would latch on to that hope of us
Like my world depended on it.
Not just my world,
But your world.
In this case I would never let go.
I would never let go of your world
Just as you have never let go of mine.
That’s why I see you every morning,
I know you haven’t forgotten,
And I know you still care.
Deep down...it’s there.
Our world.
You Could Stitch A Quilt And Stay Warm
Rip through my heart
Tear it to pieces
Believe me when I say
There’s enough love there
To go around.
Gobstopper
People act hard
On the outside
But really are soft
At the core.
You must have gotten
This mixed up along the way.
The Void
My everything
Dances in the center
Of the floor
Surrounded by rays of sunshine
And petals from the most
Exotic and extravagant flowers
Known to sprout their beautiful bodies
To this earth
And yet
No one...
No one dances with her
Because everyone knows
That she moves in a way that
No body can keep up.
Especially not me,
Who watches her in awe
Across the floor
In a void
Loved by no one.
Life In The Cage
Hook me by your tongue
Whisper in my ear that
You love me
Shackle the chain
Around my heel
And tell me that
We’ll be happy
Together forever
As you prepare
My collar and muzzle.
The Love That Strangles II
Tenderly touch
And drag me under
The fields of silk and cotton
The heat of you against me
Suffocate me with your heart
And suppress all sound.
We shall speak no evil
Forevermore.
Nostalgic Nightmares
You dream
Of meeting someone
Just like me again,
So you can have all your fun.
Permanent Markers
I never knew how embarrassing
It would be to talk about you now.
This Is An Audio Recording For Your Sanity
Welcome to this weeks
Guided meditation.
Close your eyes.
Stop and listen to your thoughts.
Imagine you’re in your happy place.
Imagine this wonderful place
Surrounded by everyone you love
Doing everything you love to do.
...
...
...
Now open your eyes,
And realize that this happy place
Does not exist.
Unrequited
In an ironic way,
It’s sort of funny
How we learn to love those
Who never seem
To deserve it.
Red Flags
I’m looking for the answers...
So are you
And if you’re looking for help
Go elsewhere
Cause all I’ve found
In my search
In my youth
Is heartache
The longing for affection
The hole it creates
How you’ll end up
Digging
Digging
Digging
But ultimately drown
In your own attempts
At life after love
You’ll drown
Looking for the answers
So go elsewhere.
There’s No Cure
Unlike her love,
Her demons are contagious.
Your Apologies Are Unapologetic And Untimely
God, I hope someday
Someone makes you
Feel just like me.
Alone.
Then you can apologize.
r /> The Good Samaritan
I’m slaving away
At the pages
Just to warn the others
About your transgressions.
Nothing’s Good Enough For My Girl
I could give you the Sun
Then you’d ask for the moon
I would steal you the moon
Just to beg for the stars
Once I hand you the stars
You would look up above
See nothing up high
In the black midnight sky
Look me dead in the eye
And demand the Earth.
The Love That Strangles III
Oh the things I would do
To be with you
Are ruthless and cold
But daring and bold
I’d fight every villain
I’d slay every monster
I’d stand up to darkness
And strangle the heartless.
But truth be told
I’d follow blindfold
And show those that taint gold
The end as foretold.
This Is Not Rhetorical
Are you competing
With the Devil
To see who can
Collect the most souls?
I’m sure you’re winning by a landslide.